Chances are they don`t feel loved. but… And here`s the important thing… the crowd they feel loved is not the measure of their love. There may come a day when your agreement no longer serves your relationship, and that doesn`t matter. But while you have it, use it. So often, couples have deep conversations that lead to relationship breakthroughs, only to fall back a few days later into old behaviors. Maintaining these discussions in a relationship agreement helps us to hold ourselves to account. Personally, it helped me to have something written to maintain my relationship and stay in love. Love can happen to us, but if we want it to stop, we must be proactive.
Love contracts do not always protect the most problematic romantic relationships. The romantic relationships that pose the most problems to the company are those where participants are the least likely to sign love contracts. “They are ineffective with [potentially the most destructive] relationships – for example, the CEO has an affair with the vice president, and the two are married. … The cases that bite the company are cases where people don`t sign love contracts anyway,” says Neal. However, their use is not widespread at present. Even among lawyers familiar with love contracts, most write less than a dozen a year. And only 10 percent of HR professionals say companies should encourage employees to sign an out-of-court settlement based on responses to the SHRM Workplace Romance Poll 2006. When I wrote this book, I thought of every child who grew up without a father and became confused by its limitations and definitions.
Every teenage girl who has never been told that she was beautiful and dignified, and therefore she holds out and presents herself for unhealthy experiences, for any woman who has been in abusive relationships and who always returns in unhealthy love patterns so that she never learns what is healthy. The idea is one of the must-haves to work the “love” contract. This is the way of saying to reality: “What can I get in return for your love?” This question makes this the most difficult of all.